The Santa Bailout

Introducing our latest infographic that might land you an iPad 2! This competition has now closed. A winner will be announced soon.
Christmas comes but once a year and thank goodness it does – many of us find our finances stretched to the limit during the holidays, but this festive season take a moment to think of poor old Santa Claus’s predicament.
A recent Gallup poll revealed that the average American plans to spend $764 on Christmas gifts this year, but children all over the world are taught from a young age that it’s Santa, not their parents, who brings them their Christmas presents. So this revelation about American Christmas spending made us wonder just how much financial trouble Santa would be in if he actually did have to foot the entire bill for Christmas.
The results were hardly surprising: Kris Kringle’s finances are in dire straits! If Santa Claus were to give every man, woman and child $764 worth of gifts he would land himself in over $5tn worth of debt every year – around half of the US’s total public economic debt. The increasing price of popular toys and gadgets over the years has exacerbated Santa’s economic woes and decades of workplace upheaval have left things at the North Pole on the edge of a financial meltdown.
Old Saint Nick finds himself in need of a bailout and a new financial plan pronto and the only one who can help him is you. As sympathisers to Santa’s situation, First Choice are offering the ultimate Christmas gift, a 32 GB iPad 2 WiFi, to whoever comes up with the best solution to Santa Claus’s predicament and the complete Harry Potter DVD box-set as a second prize. Help us save Santa!
To enter the competition, all you have to do is comment on this blog post with your witty, insightful solution to Saint Nick’s crushing financial woes. Then send an email with your comment to blog@firstchoice.co.uk so we can track your entry. First Choice will select the funniest most astute answer as the winner. To help your chances, tweet: “Santa’s finances are a mess, so I’m blogging to #SaveSanta & #win an iPad2 with @FirstChoiceUK.”
Webmasters who want to get involved can run the competition on their own websites. Simply post the infographic on your site, along with the following text: “First Choice, home of all inclusive, have created a competition to fix Santa’s finances. To win an iPad 2 add your comment below and tell us how you think we can save Santa from financial ruin. Be sure to send an email with your comment to blog@firstchoice.co.uk so they can track your entry”. Make sure to include the link to http://www.firstchoice.co.uk and we will link back to you when we announce the winners! To notify us that you are participating in the competition, tweet a link to your blog along with the message: “Santa’s finances are a mess, help us #SaveSanta & #win an iPad2 with @FirstChoiceUK.”
The competition closes at midnight on December 24th 2011. Click here to view the competition’s terms and conditions
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December 7th, 2011 at 12:55 pm
Just call Super Mario (Mario Monti, the NEW italian Prime Minister) hopefully he should give few good advise.
December 7th, 2011 at 12:57 pm
Book your holiday with first choice, you are sure to save £s. Then you’ll have enough money to buy lots of presents!
December 7th, 2011 at 4:34 pm
There are many children and adults alike that have toys / items that are no longer played with or needed – prehaps santa should ask everyone to donate an item or toy which they no longer need or play with and then he can redistribute them. This way he would have no financial outlay and he would be saving the planet by recycling, this is a win, win situation
December 7th, 2011 at 5:12 pm
not to take advice from the person resposible for the euro
December 7th, 2011 at 6:36 pm
Firstly, get all those elves to contribute. Next get them to have a word with their mates the Leprechauns – a little hint as to the geographical positioning of those rainbows’ ends would be useful. Next the reindeer – gardeners will pay a premium for good quality manure, if it comes from flying reindeer it’s got to be good stuff. Finally, every household knows the rules – you have to leave a mincepie for Santa and a carrot for the reindeer, maybe even a tipple too. Now I know delivering pressies is hard work but there must be a bit of surplus you could sell off.
December 7th, 2011 at 8:11 pm
Simply pop out on the 23rd (no-one will be expecting you, so take own mince pie and sherry) to collect all the unwanted gifts from last Christmas, dust them off and hey presto!
December 7th, 2011 at 8:19 pm
Simply trademark ‘Santa Claus’, ‘Santa’, ‘Father Christmas’ and each reindeer’s name (prancer, dancer, well you get the idea…), don’t bother with the elves for no-one knows their names, and get a registered design on your outfit.
Then watch the money roll-in as every drunken party-goer and ad-land campaign coughs up royalty and license fees to use your image!
p.s. don’t forget to cancel all these licenses on January 1st and renew on about 24th November – give or take a week each year.
December 8th, 2011 at 12:00 am
Have Santa and his elves enter millions of online contests and use the winnings as gifts…
December 8th, 2011 at 12:26 am
Less gifts, more lumps of coal – you know they deserve it!!
December 8th, 2011 at 1:05 am
Santa has to pay the elves for their work, so he has to make money from the Christmas presents he leaves. He leaves the kids the presents, but he sends a bill to the parents. And Santa is such a wonderful person that he NEVER leaves a present that he knows the mom or dad cannot afford! Children are free to ask for anything they wanted, and Santa would bring them what he knew Mommy could pay for!
December 8th, 2011 at 1:57 am
Santa should sell all those expensive presents, get down to the pound shop and buy a load of cheapo gifts then do a runner by booking a first choice holiday with the change.
December 8th, 2011 at 7:48 am
Book yourself a holiday Santa ..got to first choice, you will save loads and you deserve the break…
December 8th, 2011 at 9:06 am
Santa is an institution and does not need a bailout
December 8th, 2011 at 12:04 pm
Santa, Book yourself a fantastic break with firstchoice, pick up your passport and pack your sack – because you will be off on a dream trip with no worries courtesy of firstchoice
December 8th, 2011 at 12:43 pm
Book all your Christmas Eve travel with Firstchoice, then you can save money on running all those Reindeer!
December 8th, 2011 at 1:30 pm
He should branch out into the Christmas card delivery market – have you seen the price of stamps these days?!
December 8th, 2011 at 2:45 pm
Santa should start a Reality TV show. We all know those bring in millions of dollars in just one season!! Winner gets $1mil and the opportunity to compete with the other 3 seasons winners to ‘help’ Santa on Christmas Eve! !!
December 8th, 2011 at 5:32 pm
Santa, it’s simple. Instead of having the elves make presents, have them make PARTS of presents. Then package them up as “make your own” kits. “Stitch your own bear”. “Build your own bike” you get the idea. You will save a fortune on labour, the children will learn all sorts of motor skills, have a heap of fun and undoubtably treat the finished item with more love and care because they made it themselves.
The elves who are no longer working on toy building could instead be spending their time melting snow, bottling it, and selling it as a luxury anti-aging product with a very high price tag… trust me, when those wrinkles start to appear we will buy ANYTHING based on a mere promise!
December 8th, 2011 at 6:45 pm
That Santa bloke,so stony broke,should utilise his plastic, So Bankers pay for xmas cheer,Now isn’t that fantastic!!!
December 8th, 2011 at 8:13 pm
Instead of using a sleigh and clearly lots of fuel; Santa should learn to use Parcel force! This would mean he wouldnt need the reindeers so would also save on food and bedding!
December 9th, 2011 at 6:11 am
Santa should start a Foundation like Tony Blair and the money will come rolling in.
December 9th, 2011 at 7:59 am
Santa,s solution to his problem. Santa should do what I did – Get a loan from “SANTAnder”
December 9th, 2011 at 10:22 am
I thought long and hard about who had got Santa (and us all) into this financial mess. I came to the conclusion it was the bankers who were mainly responsible. So I came up with a cunning plan. I told Santa about my plan and said he could use his special Christmas powers to get himself out of this predicament and on my advice this is what he decided to do:
Santa would go to all the wealthiest bankers around the world and ask them to hand over their ill-gotten gains. It just so happens all the naughty bankers were the same people who were always on his naughty boy/girl list and were always the greedy ones who wanted the most expensive and most number of presents. Santa knew about all the really naughty things they had done and would threaten to spill the beans to everyone. He would also add an extra threat – he would not deliver any prezzies to their kids and their kid’s kids if they refused to pay up.
So Santa got onto his spare sleigh as his main sleigh had been repossessed and flew around the world to visit all the bankers. Luckily his threats worked and they all agreed to pay up. With all the money amassed Santa set up a bank – THE BANK OF SANTA. He continued with the next part of his plan. He hired the most nuttiest and most genius professor he could find and set him to building a time machine. Now, it didn’t take long for the professor to build the time machine especially as he had the special services of Santa available who could get anything he wanted no matter how far or how inaccessible.
Next, Santa hired the best financial whizz kids, making sure he only chose those that had always been on his good boy/girl list and were good and honest. Armed with their valuable knowledge of the best investments, Santa used his time machine to go way back in time and invest all the ill-gotten gains secured from the bankers in the most lucrative accounts.
Santa returned to the present time where his investments were now worth trillions which he then transferred to his bank. Santa now has enough money to do his job and he’ll never run out of money again because he has his own bank and the best bankers. And he will never get in the same situation again because he’ll know if any of his bankers start turning naughty – remember he’s Santa. If I had to bank anywhere I know who my FIRST CHOICE would be – The Bank of Santa.
December 9th, 2011 at 11:30 am
I think this infographic is a clear sign of people and greed today. Large companies look for ways to make more and more money so they push kids to push their parents into buying such expensive gifts.
The majority of children nowadays wouldn’t know what to do with a football but they know how to wiggle a joystick.
Poor santa and his debt! I’ll just ask for a cup and ball this year to ease his worries!
December 9th, 2011 at 1:42 pm
Santa should take Christmas back to a family Celebration. One gift for everyone, along with a good deed that they should do for someone else. By encouraging people to do something for someone else – it will spark a pay it forward attitude. Next Year, Santa won’t need to supply presents – all the presents will come to him!
December 9th, 2011 at 6:05 pm
Dear Santa,
might I suggest that you get together with the other heads of states and do nothing useful except look important.
The good news is that utterly no-one understands the debt so you can get away suggesting anything you want in the name of cutting down the debt- oranges and banannas for the kiddies all round!
December 10th, 2011 at 12:21 pm
HI THERE I FOUND A WAY TO GET RID OF THIS SANTA DEBT PROBLEM GO TO GUMTREE FREEBIES OR GO ON EBAY TO GET TOYS FOR CHILDREN THEN IF U NEED MONEY GO TO QUICK QUID WHICH GIVES TEN PERCENT OFF WHEN YOU HAVE TO PAY IT BACK SO SAY YOU TOOK OUT £100 YOU ONLY HAVE TO PAY £90 AND GET TO KEEP THE EXTRA £10 FOR FREE OR IF U NEED A LOT OF CASH THEN TAKE OUT £10000 AND YOU HAVE TO PAY £9000 AND THE VOUCHER WILL ALLOW YOU TO KEEP 10 PERCENT WHICH IS THE REMAINING £1000
December 10th, 2011 at 4:39 pm
Santa should rent out his elves as house-elves for all us Muggles!
December 10th, 2011 at 6:59 pm
So to save Santa right, firstly he needs to cut down on his heating bills, so a move to the middle of the Sahara desert will be in order, obviously with the help of First Choice. Next he will need to sell all those clothes, and but a brand on it so he can sell them for £100 a coat. Next a reasonable measure is to save on the little things like carrots and sherry, this will mean that the reindeers will not be needed and can be sold, and with that money he can buy huskies for the trip on Christmas Eve. One of the other options, would be to do absolutely nothing on Christmas Eve and not let anyone have any presents. This way he can make sure that there is enough money in the kitty for him to get present next year.
December 10th, 2011 at 8:12 pm
Santa should loan out his elves during the year when he isn’t so busy to make some extra cash.
December 10th, 2011 at 8:40 pm
Santa should give First Choice holidays as Christmas presents, he’d only have to deliver one Christmas present per family and he’d surely get group discount with all those bookings!!
December 10th, 2011 at 9:39 pm
Set up a £1.50 a minute call center for all the boys and girls to call to inform Santa of what they want.
Join the EU, and convince them to reduce the debt by half (like Greece)
December 10th, 2011 at 10:47 pm
For a season of good will.
Without a massive shopping bill.
Recycle the old into something new.
That’ll keep the elves busy with something to do.
So it’s egg boxes and sticky tape in your santa sack.
Which means we can have our money back.
Come on Santa and hear my plea.
Make it recycled gifts from thee!
December 11th, 2011 at 2:43 am
Two options:
1. Make friends with a banker – he’s got loads of money because he gets a massive bonus
2. Make friends with David Cameron – because he knows the answers to everything – or so he thinks.
December 11th, 2011 at 12:45 pm
Notes from the Clause & Co. AGM 2011
As the Head of Elf and Safety and the HR Dept. (Helpers Resources) I have been given the task to present some of the suggestions put forward at our last meeting regarding possible ways we could raise funds to help Santa out of his current financial crisis.
Can I first reassure all employees that ALL rumours regarding the militarisation of Penguins by the Tin Soldiers to enforce a Tinsel Tax and a subsequent embargo on Mistletoe are totally unfounded, and will not be given any consideration, whatsoever by Santa!
The FIRST CHOICE of the board however is to embrace current technology and focus our efforts to raise capital through media revenue and as such we are strongly considering the suggestions below:-
SNOWMAN’S GOT TALENT – Frosty came up with this idea to showcase the abundance of Snowmanship here in Lapland. Unfortunately though it seems that all they can really do well is to model scarf’s, hats and buttons?! The idea may also have some production difficulties and may not be viable as sadly the heat from the stage lighting seems to “reduce” the number of our contestants at an alarming rate before the end of their act! Also as a side note can I take this opportunity to apologise profusely to all those that were offended by the precocious young Snowboy that thought it would be funny to remove said buttons and scarf while humming the theme “you can leave your hat on” rest assured he has been disciplined and his parents notified!
I’M A RAINDEER GET ME OUTA HERE – Rudolph put forward this suggestion because as he put it, “…me an the fella’s are all sat about kickin our heels due to the lack of sleigh, an considering that without us, i mean lets face it, we make it all happen every year, without us… “At that point Santa reprimanded Rudolph, calling him a “jumped up prima donna” that abuses his fame enough as it is. Santa continued his diatribe, explaining that if he was to allow Rudolph and the other reindeers to just loll about in the jungle playing reindeer games he would not only be supporting the social misjudgement that the only way to be seen as successful in today’s society is to find fame, but also that eating a kangaroo’s thingy was in some way, real entertainment!!? (At that point Santa had to have a sit down and a nice mug of tea to calm himself down a little)
The next suggestion was put forward by the Easter Bunny who just happened to be here thanks to a great deal he found with First Choice Winter Ski Holidays. We have since found out however that this diabolical scheme, which he gave some ludicrous title I think it was the “THE EGGS FACTOR “ if i remember correctly. Anyway as it turns out, this devious plan was in fact cooked up by some friend of his called Simon… something. Who not only blagged his way onto a free Holiday but couldn’t resist the opportunity to try and manipulate Santa’s dire situation to meet his own ends. As such Santa asked them both to leave immediately, it was reported that someone overheard Santa mumbling angrily into his beard, something along the lines of “…never trusting a man that wears his pants higher than you wear your own” on his way to get another calming cup of tea. Let this be a lesson to us ALL.
The Final suggestion and the one we think has the most promise, was offered to us by a shy Elf called Dobby, after spending some time in the Muggle world he believes that we should embrace what he likes to call SNOWCIAL NETWORKING. His plan is to roll out a twin pronged attack under the names of ELFBOOK and GLITTER these sites will change the way we live and work as we know it.
Instead of all the “Boys and Girls” writing to Santa, they will now have the opportunity, for a small fee of course (and a small administration fee too!) to vote on their friends profile throughout the year to determine whether they have been “Naughty or Nice.” If at the end of the year they have been voted as “Nice” they will be emailed a “*Gift Voucher for Peace and Love” from Santa which they can then redeem solely from Santa & Co. OR XMAZON as we would now like to be known. (Rebranding memo will be emailed shortly)
The savings we make on manufacture, logistics, labour, Reindeer food, Sleigh Fuel and Personal trainers for Santa will without doubt see an upturn in our Fiscal growth for the next erm… Eon or two and who knows… maybe the message of Peace and Love may catch on too??
*Vouchers are non transferable and cannot be exchanged for expensive toys or monetary equivalent prizes.
December 11th, 2011 at 2:46 pm
christmas is an expensive affair
santa’s savings disappear into thin air
so how can i save santa from financial ruin
and stop his money shrivelling like a prune
i’d say collect the carrots left out for the reindeer
there’d be enough to last the year
and indulge in a little self control
and use mince pies for the elf payroll
of course he can have a hard earned snack
from the leftover goodies collected in his sack
he’ll have a better chance of fitting down the chimney
and deliver all the toys a lot more briskly
Christmas is an expensive affair
and spending should be taken with care
but to help santa get ahead
you could deliver my ipad present instead
merry christmas everyone.
December 11th, 2011 at 5:51 pm
This is an easy fix. It’s not about how much you spend, it’s about how much thought goes into the gift.
I’m sure I’m not alone when I say I cherish the gifts that my kids have made for me – a home made tree decoration or card, an ever-so-slightly dodgy breakfast in bed or a hand knitted ‘scarf’ (….the length of a standard ruler ‘cos she ran out of wool’!!!) – as opposed to something that they struggle to pay for.
Let’s pay it forward this year. Think of one thoughtful gift for another family and let them know that you don’t want anything in return but encourage them to give a gift to another family instead. Spend Christmas Day enjoying your family gift – whether it’s a board game, a movie you always wanted to see together but never had time or just a huge box of chocolates to share whilst watching repeats on the TV. And if you know of anyone spending Christmas alone, invite them over to join in for a couple of hours – the more the merrier.
And then Santa can have the night off instead
December 11th, 2011 at 6:22 pm
(to the tune of Santa Baby)
Santa Baby,
Let us give you our help to be:
debt free -
We’ll help you cut your costs, Santa baby,
and try to keep you solvent tonight
Santa Baby,
You’ve got some present buyin’ to do;
poor you –
We’ll help out with your woes, Santa baby,
and only wish for stuff that we need
Think of all the junk that we’ve bought,
Look at all the money that’s spent without thought,
This year, the children wont think less of me
If you don’t bring them a Playstation 3..
Santa Baby,
What’s the point of Christmas? it’s not,
‘I got’
Friends and loved ones all near, Santa baby,
For that’s the thing that’s needed alright…
Santa honey,
I hope you’ll find that your costs
are lost,
And now we can see,
Santa baby,
The grotto won’t be mortgaged tonight…
Santa cutie,
Hoping that will cut down the stress,
we guess,
Maybe take a short break,
Santa cutie,
Take Mrs Claus and go treat her right….
So we’ll trim our Christmas trees,
With things that mean something to you and me,
We’ll be fine, check your balance online
And you’ll be well in the black you see
Santa baby,
Forgot to mention one little fact,
Your tax,
You don’t pay V.A.T,
Santa baby,
So claim it off the taxman tonight..
..claim it off the taxman tonight….
December 11th, 2011 at 8:54 pm
If I were Santa, I would round-up my mates Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy and seek advice from Martin ‘Money Saving Expert’ Lewis. If anybody can save Christmas, Martin is your man.
December 11th, 2011 at 9:49 pm
Santa is magical – he should go back in time and get into business with Steve Jobs right at the beginning of Apple – he’d be rolling in it by now!
December 11th, 2011 at 9:55 pm
Stopping in and doing without is the new going out and spending. Its all dont to habits and we just have to get you used to it.
December 11th, 2011 at 10:55 pm
lower the age in which kids ‘officially’ stop believing in Santa by 3 years and also reinstate the ‘lump of coal’ as a genuine present option for bad boys and girls.
December 12th, 2011 at 6:30 pm
Simple really. If you copyright the ‘Santa’ look, red clothes, funny hat and white beard then you make a fortune. I really do not know why you didnt do it sooner Santa! If you had £1 for everyone one and thing that duplicate this look then you would make a mint!
December 12th, 2011 at 6:41 pm
Quite frankly, working just one night per year does not make economic sense. Perhaps he should consider taking a part time job for 300 days per year, which would give him that much needed income
December 12th, 2011 at 9:49 pm
I onced recieved a soap on a rope
Although that probably wasn’t as bad as the iron board cover. Soooo santa should just stop with the rubbish gifts, thus saving him millions. Simples.
December 12th, 2011 at 10:28 pm
It’s got to be mighty expensive to heat your pad at the North Pole all year, why not try asking First Choice for a great deal to Christmas Island?! (p.s. I really have been very very good this year) xx
December 14th, 2011 at 10:28 am
Santa should use the royal mail to deliver his gifts, he’d save a lot of money on reindeer maintenance (even at the risk of making every child in the land extremely angry on Christmas day – It might prepare them for when they’re older and have to use the Royal Mail) and he could replace all his elves with electronic present wrapping machines. Then to save even more money santa could sell out more by heavily focusing on product placement, I’m pretty certain theres no legislation for tobacco companies advertising on Santa’s Sleigh, I’m surpised they haven’t seen the gap in the market yet. and if Santa trademarks his face and catch phrase “Ho Ho Ho” he could earn loads of money sueing everyone that uses his image or catch phrase!
December 14th, 2011 at 4:21 pm
Santa should get the whole world to take part in a worldwide ‘secret santa’ – every individual buys just 1 present and this means that everybody gets 1 present in return – also santa would save on fuel by not having to deliver the presents!
December 14th, 2011 at 4:28 pm
“Need a loan before Christmas? Then call QuickQuid! How to look richer and be poorer, call QuickQuid, NOW!”
December 14th, 2011 at 4:37 pm
To help bailout Santa, the elves have devised this cheeky letter which has been sent to the leaders of the world;
‘we at the north pole are in dire straits producing and delivering requested presents around the world and we kindly request money as soon as possible to help fund this Christmas tradition. Santa has his hands tied and we have gone on strike until there is suitable amount of money in the pot.
please send bundles of used £20 notes secured with elastic bands in a jiffy bag addressed to: first choice Santa bailout, north pole who will arrange the ransom drop.
please be assured we are serious, organised and armed with hair dryers. pay now or the snowman gets it.
yours faithfully,
the hard working elves at the north pole.’
December 14th, 2011 at 4:44 pm
I think we ought to give Christmas a miss for two years and use the money saved to put everything back to rights. Then we can start again only more cautiously?
December 14th, 2011 at 5:00 pm
First of all, Santa needs to find a desperate stupid bunch of Elves to form a coalition with, then bring in a stealth tax on the children’s presents! following this bring in austerity measures , such as a cutting back on food for the reindeer, they don’t need quite so much food as they are only working part of the year and are quite probably claiming income support.
This will all be greatly unpopular, but just blame it all on the Elves.
December 14th, 2011 at 5:07 pm
Maybe Santa should make gifts instead of buying them. And because you can’t put a price on the best things in life (which are supposedly free anyway) Santa should just visit each home spread love, hope,health and good cheer!
December 14th, 2011 at 5:15 pm
Santa should have a de-clutter of old stuff and sell what does not get used any more or recycle it and make something new from it.
December 14th, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I think Santa needs to implement some harsh austerity measures. Perhaps there could be cutbacks to the elves’ wages, benefits, pensions and healthcare, and a lowering of toy factory safety standards? Those elves have had it far too good for far too long, it’s about time they made sacrifices too. We are, after all, all in this together.
In the spirit of deficit reduction, he could even fire 25% of his elves, and start means testing children to see what presents they deserve? Maybe he could move the bar of the ‘naughty’ and ‘nice’ lists, so that more children are considered naughty? That way he can get as many as 30% of children off Christmas present entitlements and back onto Coal, which is considerably cheaper per unit than an iPhone. Perhaps instead of giving presents to children for free, he could loan presents to children with interest, to be paid back to the SLC (Santa Loans Company) once they are earning over £15,000 per annum? The loans issued to children could be called ‘Toy-up Fees’, and could be as much as £9,000 per year. These measures alone would dramatically reduce Santa’s spending.
Maybe he could also lower Credits And Reimburements for Reindeer Of The Sleigh (CARROTS) allowances, fire Prancer (he was always a slacker) and Blitzen (after his behaviour at last year’s Christmas party) and work with a reduced team of reindeer? After all, it’s a competitive jobs market at the moment, and what he’d lose in airspeed he’d gain in CARROTS savings.
Failing that, he could start a QE program (Quantitive Elving), or even ask for a bailout for his bad debts from the Northpolezone economies. One thing is for sure, if he’s not careful the Christmas Ratings Agencies may downgrade his Christmas score, leading to higher loan repayments and more hardship.
Some tough decisions need to be made, and there will be resistance from all quarters, particularly the National Union of Reindeer & Other Mythical Creatures (NUROMC) who will resist any attacks on their pay and conditions. A spokesperson for the union, Rudolph, said the following: “My nose glows bright red, and I can fly at over 2,924,180mph… Santa needs us and should know better than to risk a strike at this time of year.”
Frankly, I’m just glad I’m not Santa right now.
December 14th, 2011 at 6:32 pm
Let’s think about how fast Santa is first.
Research suggests 2,924,180mph.
Now, he could be a bit of a Robin Hood character and instead of purchasing these items – He could just nip in and out of huge warehouses, taking sleigh-loads by the milliseconds. No-one would be quick enough to even catch a glimpse of these antics!
Voila, happy children all over the world.
December 14th, 2011 at 7:21 pm
Santa does not have a financial crisis – he has an opportunity. As we have been told global warming is imminent, instread of presents Santa should give a small piece of ice in a sample bottle as very shortly it will be worth its weight in gold and will last forever as long as it is kept in the freezer. Once he has run out of ice the North Pole will become the place to go for your holidays (remember global warming) so Santa can just sit back let First Choice take control and watch the money roll in. Not very Christmassy though
December 14th, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Santa – you’ve got to cut down on that list. Introduce clearer objectives for children. I’ve seen plenty of naughty kids with nice presents! If you’re on the naughty list – you aint getting a present! Also the time contraints of delivering over one night are unreasonable and therefore a staged approach should be introduced where presents are delivered globally from 20th-27th December. Some deliveries may be outsourced.
December 14th, 2011 at 7:59 pm
Things are so bad for St Nick now, He is laying off his reindeers First Choice are offering to fly him around the world to deliver the presents to all the children of the world.. What a great airline. Fly With First Choice
December 14th, 2011 at 9:24 pm
Its a four step process:
1. get better elves, with better work ethics. No one likes a lazy elf.
2. Feed the reindeer less, It will makes them lighter meaning sleigh travel is going to be more efficient.
3. Base himself in a more central base, North pole is pretty much far from everything.
4. Rent out the naughty book, people will pay for that sort of information I’m guessing.
December 15th, 2011 at 5:00 am
All Santa needs to do is go to the Government and tell them he has gotten a few sums wrong, made a few mistakes and now needs a massive pot of money to bail him out. No one says no to Santa (the word no has only recently came into our PM’s vocab as it would seem.)
December 15th, 2011 at 8:03 am
Santa should hire out his reindeer for the other 364 days of the year. They could patrol the train lines looking for metal theives- then Rudolph should go along the train carriages with a bucket get payment from the bankers commuting into the city. Sorted.
December 15th, 2011 at 8:57 am
There’s a temporary night security guard job going at ToysRus in the run up to Xmas…take your sack to work on the last day
December 15th, 2011 at 9:28 am
santa’s ‘first choice’ of success,
is a holiday and a rest.
For he has learned from Christmas past,
to recycle make things last.
Then your savings will mature,
and your ‘present’ is future.
December 15th, 2011 at 12:28 pm
Sign up to moneysavingexpert.com, not only can you find great tips on saving money you can also head over to the competition forum and enter competitions that users have listed, you will never have to buy anything else if you can win it.
December 15th, 2011 at 7:10 pm
What Santa needs to do is set new rules to save the world from financial meltdown! Primarily, he needs to set a budget per child, then must adhere to the following:
1) 1 present per child
2) Stocking fillers MUST be from a charity shop
It’s all about reduce, re-use and re-cycle!!
Merry Christmas!
Love S.A.M
December 15th, 2011 at 9:41 pm
Freecycle, Santa, you know it!!
And the way children behave these days, a few more stockings with coal wouldn’t go amiss…
December 15th, 2011 at 9:56 pm
Well Santa, I have the perfect solution for you. Get the grown ups to believe in you, and the kids to believe in God. Then all the money they waste on religion could go to buy toys for the kids. Although, then the kids would be asking for bibles and crucifixes. Oh well, back to the drawing board.
December 16th, 2011 at 6:23 pm
Hey Santa. Set the elves to work bottling that lovely, genuine MAGICAL Santa snow…and then sell it all on EBAY making millions and millions of pounds!!! Who wouldn’t want to purchase a souvenir direct from the man himself? Sorted!
December 16th, 2011 at 7:16 pm
Enter a load of comps ending soon, win good prizes and give those as pressies!!
December 16th, 2011 at 7:51 pm
What Ole Santa needs to do is get some companys to sponser his sleigh…get first choice and any number of other reputable companies to put their logo on the sleigh each paying a small price for this amazing unique marketing promotion! he will have plenty of money after this as who wouldnt want santa promoting their company….and Awesome Presents will ensue!!
Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas!!
December 17th, 2011 at 7:39 am
Santa’s in debt, but just what can he do?
Too many presents to get around to!
He must make a statement to tell of his woes,
To tell all the children what he will propose.
First: just one stocking to find by the tree,
Or foot of the bed, or by the chimney:
Not dozens of presents, just one – what a shame!
But a present’s a present by anyone’s claim.
Second: the children should think about those
Who don’t receive anything, that’s how it goes.
Tell them to ask, not ‘What did you get?’
(That would help Santa get out of his debt),
But, ‘What did you give?’ is a far better phrase,
And cheer and goodwill would emanate rays
Of the spirit of Christmas. When all’s said and done:
It’s all about sharing, and not ‘Number One’.
December 17th, 2011 at 8:49 pm
Go old school! Give simple wooden toys, or toy kits so the kids have to make their own fun. That way they are using their minds and utilizing green and renewable resources.
December 17th, 2011 at 9:25 pm
Priceline everything!! and Ebay ofcourse
December 17th, 2011 at 10:55 pm
Santa should lay off his workforce, get apprentices and the long term unemployed to work for nothing and transfer any jobs they can’t cover to China. Meanwhile, he should reply to all Santa letters with a standard reply, that children are in for a tough couple of years and then proceed to blame everything from immigrants to Europe to a broken society. Finally when Santa has had enough, he can retire with a big present of his own: a huge bonus! Merry Christmas, Santa!
December 18th, 2011 at 5:08 pm
To avoid this HO HO WHOLE financial mess, Santa could have taken out an ICEsa from the bank and SLEIGH’d the crisis! Then he would’ve got a SILENT NIGHT’s sleep!
December 18th, 2011 at 7:22 pm
This is a 3 step process:
1) Now Santa can either go to Germany or the Chinese for a cash bailout, then default on the loan.
2) Tell all the children in the world that Santa has gone into rehab for the next 10 years, just like most economies in the Euro Zone.
3) Cut up Santa’s credit cards and make him redundant.
Problem solved.
December 19th, 2011 at 12:32 am
sub contract out to a courier firm?
December 19th, 2011 at 11:25 am
Firstly, as everyone who has watched Elf knows, elves can have two other jobs aside from working in Santa’s workshop, and so for some of the year Santa should hire out his elves in food and shoe factories. With the amount of elves he this could help to put quite a lot of money in the bank.
Also I’d recommend wholesale to him, because if he’s seriously buying each toy for its retail price he’s getting hugely ripped off.
And since he only uses his reindeer one day a year, what’s the problem in charging for a ‘fly a reindeer’ stand, like the donkey ones you find on the beach. If they travelled the world, he’s soon be rich again.
Finally he should start making public appearance. He could make a charity event for himself, and sign peoples t-shirts. Oh and of course, think of all the money he’d make from his own autobiography – maybe “The man behind the beard”. And who could forget all the men who dress as Santa – surely they should be paying him royalties, as well as all the Christmas songs that mention him!
So come on Santa, it’s easy to make money in your position, so buck up your ideas and actually work for more than one night a year.
December 19th, 2011 at 7:33 pm
Give every child there own elf for Christmas!
Then every year that elf can make things or do up items to recycle, When times get better the elfs can go back with you to the north pole – Time to put your feet up Santa” for a while, after all these years hard work! It does not go un-noticed!! Happy Christmas!!
December 19th, 2011 at 11:08 pm
Ensure you claim overtime for all the late nights in the lead up to the big day, Christmas Eve should be time and a half and Christmas Day at least double time as you won’t get home until the early hours. If this doesn’t help, you could always steal some presents and sell them on Ebay (just not mine as I am hoping for an iPad this year)!
December 20th, 2011 at 10:41 am
Working once a year will not pay the bills. With a look like Santa clearly he is very recognisable which would make it hard to work over the counter such as a in a supermarket or bank where there would be too many distractions. Maybe he could train as a tattoo artist or become a trucker where the red suit & heavily bearded look would not be a problem.
I would also suggest a vedgetable allotment to provide a savings on the carrots needed for his reindeer.
Finally I would suggest investing in a large freezer, this would enable Santa to freeze all those mince pies & other foodie treats that he is given which would ensure a constant supply throughout the year. Treats he could eat himself or share.
December 20th, 2011 at 6:28 pm
Re-gift Santa all those unwanted presents are someones dream gift.
December 20th, 2011 at 8:54 pm
The Santa Claus brand is possibly the biggest brand in the world. To raise funding and secure long term future funding Santa needs to fully exploit two way product endorsements, product placement and sponsor links to major global businesses.
Initially a charge on the copyright of future use of the Santa Claus brand by all major retailers and producers. Based on an agreed percentage of seasonal sales. Immediate agreements with major companies on the previous use of the brand for a one off fee. This action could prevent creditors from taking immediate action against Santa Claus.
Close ties formed with key market leaders to take advantage of their experience and negotiate service provisions. For example:
Richard Branson who has an established brand and experience of diversifying. Opportunities exist with the Virgin Banking proposals for future financial management and the Virgin Space flights for distribution cost saving opportunities.
Additionally relocation of the Santa Claus HQ may be an opportunity to save on costs – such as heating etc. Whilst further reducing transport costs and risks due to bad weather. Relocation may provide an opportunity for reorganisation and staff rationalisation along with a cheaper work force.
A full study is recommended in order to develop this further into a 3 stage rescue plan.
Stage 1 business rescue – securing an income from the brand copyright
Stage 2 business efficiency – financial controls, distribution and location
Stage 3 business diversification – the aggressive take over of other brands (the Easter Bunny, Guy Fawkes, Halloween etc)
This consultant is willing to offer competitive rates for under taking the work through a jointly agreed project remit.
December 20th, 2011 at 10:04 pm
We need to save St Nick from a financial mess
How to do this is anyones guess.
It must cost a fortune to buy for every girl and boy
Each one wanting a brand new toy.
To cut back on costs Santa needs to do some comps online
There’s always plenty , with prizes divine.
He is bound to win some things he can use
To give to the children, what is there to lose.
And maybe throughout the year he should request
that children donate toys that are no longer their best.
The elves should be sent to work at a summer resort
perhaps First Choice could give them a thought.
The money they make could help pay their way
so santas not skint come Christmas Day.
And when shopping for food Mrs Claus should stick to a list
And not let santa buy what he insists.
Last but not least to cut down the bill
perhaps santa should educate teens to use the pill
so there wouldn’t be so many new children each and every year
For whom he has to buy presents. it’s getting too dear.
December 21st, 2011 at 6:09 am
Saving for a reindeer day and before entering into any financial agreements check for any hidden clauses.Also try and not stay in the red for the rest of the year
December 21st, 2011 at 12:50 pm
It’s all about rebranding himself back to St. Nick.
Spend a little bit on advertising that he’s going back to his old school ways….just so the kids know.
That way he can go back to making some awesome traditional wooden toys! All these new gadgets are over rated, Yo Yo’s & Pogo’s, thats where it’s at!
December 21st, 2011 at 3:10 pm
All Santa needs to do is spend the months leading up to Christmas copulating with Mrs Claus, until he has enough children to claim a large amount of benefits. Sorted.
December 21st, 2011 at 6:45 pm
Hello First Choice!
Here is the answer to Santa’s financial Dilemma!
Please, read on:
*Cue Music, probably from Inception with jingling bells int he background*
(Scene opens to twenty-something stressed out couple who are frantically trying to wrap, as the clock counts down and the calendar says December 24)
Loudspeaker: You – yes you! (couple looks up confused) You, the last minute Christmas shopper with loved ones overseas/out of state/far away! Aren’t you tired of those excuses? You know the ones! the ones that you make to your loved ones every year at this time, because you weren’t fast enough to get their packages to mail! There is only so many times you can blame a combination of the snow and/or sleet, the (censored) postal service or a myriad of other travel delaying things. You need a solution, am I right?
(couple nods eagerly)
Loudspeaker: Here is your answer!
* shimmery music and a curtain opens to display a red gilded sleigh with reindeer and little elves with clipboards*
Loudspeaker: Santa’s Delivery Service. Just set up a time, call these great elves and they will ship your Christmas Presents INSTANTANEOUSLY – they will get to your loved ones by Christmas Morning! NO more excuses! NO more stress! How does that sound?
(Couple jumps up and down with excitement, looking half crazed).
Elf: Santa’s Delivery Service is a registered trademark and affiliate of UPS/FedEx, and is available for international callers on December 24. Order now, and you will get a Christmas Card from the Man himself. Also available for download – the Santa’s Delivery App, so you can track the seconds as Santa delivers your package under the trees of your loved ones.
*End Scene*
Basically, First Choice, I propose Santa arranges some sort of service for Christmas delivery with Fed Ex or UPS, whereby his sleigh service will take over Christmas, last minute deliveries – a previously untapped market, and deliver these gifts instantaneously along with his own 0- he has to deliver anyway, right, so the extra delivery costs will be minimal and the returns much greater. My plan also introduced multi-level upward motion for elves and a diversifying of their interests – elves can choose to stay in the manufacturing and packaging departments, or branch out to service calls, collection, billing and even commercial gigs, ensuring a happier workforce and more diligent workers. To this end I would also encourage Santa to provide a snack and break room, with cookies and hot chocolate, and possibly a Wednesday morning yoga class. Warmer clothes wouldn’t hurt either.
Thank you for your consideration! I hope Santa is happy with my proposal and finds some luck in the new year!
Happy Holidays!
Amanda
December 21st, 2011 at 11:25 pm
Santa should register his organisation as a charity, and claim back gift aid from the Governments around the world.
December 21st, 2011 at 11:27 pm
say reindeer feed is going through the roof because of it’s scarcity in The North Pole and having to be ‘sleighed’ on from parts South. Mum and Dad will have to pay part of the bill for their childrens toys and ask them not to expect too much and substitute an extra mince pie to keep them happy…a multi-layerd solution…
December 22nd, 2011 at 9:51 am
cancel Christmas, lets go on holiday instead.
December 22nd, 2011 at 12:16 pm
There are a whole wealth of revenue opportunities Santa is missing out on. He could open up his workshop in the North Pole as a tourist spot. By training up a load more reindeer, he could offer cheap flights to attract customers. He could then sell the reindeer manure to help pay for their upkeep – the magic in it will really give plants a boost.
While in the North Pole, there is loads for visitors to enjoy. Of course they will need to eat, so get those elves cooking. The Arctic Roll will go down a treat.
People could sponsor an elf and get regular updates, plus a stuffed toy elf for their very own.
In the run-up to Christmas, Santa could get out in the public eye a bit more instead of hiding away in the North Pole. Celebrities charge millions for a public appearance – and who is more famous than Santa? For very little effort, he could make a packet.
Then there is Christmas Eve itself. Would it kill families to leave a tip rather than food? I’m sure Santa is sick of mince pies but would really appreciate a couple of pounds. You start adding that up, that’s some serious tip money.
Well, there are some ideas to start you off. Once you start looking at the tourist route, the revenue ideas take on a life of their own. And I’m sure FC would do Santa a great deal on advertising… LOL
Merry Christmas!
December 22nd, 2011 at 2:27 pm
create north pole plc. outsource toy production/ delivery. take a cut of the profits and santa will let every one else do the work/which pleases mrs santa
December 22nd, 2011 at 5:53 pm
Santa should tighten his belt and pull in his reins and check his stocking up is not too deer.He should check for any hidden clause in his accounts and most of all, stay a nose in the black instead of the red.
December 22nd, 2011 at 8:32 pm
Santa should license the Santa Suit, then you won’t be able to wear a Santa suit without a license, imagine the royalties!
December 22nd, 2011 at 9:41 pm
I would get all the people in prisons around the world start producing toys for Santa to give away on Christmas day
December 22nd, 2011 at 11:25 pm
Santa should form his own Bank of Santa and issue a cash card to all parents or adults over 18, who will be buying presents for children in the name of Santa. The money in Santa’s bank needs to work in the same way as it currently does for bankers and wealthy families around the world – that is money is created out of thin air as an ASSET and NOT as DEBT. Therefore Gift Buyers can tap into this endless supply of money , they can buy anything and everything on their children’s lists – in the name of Santa. There is no debt, worry or stress and the abundant spirit of giving and sharing that is truly Christmas can be restored.
Merry Christmas.
December 23rd, 2011 at 12:24 am
OKAY THEN… WERE DO WE START…
FIRSTLY SANTA NEEDS TO USE THE RESOURCES HE HAS NOW. TODAY..
SO I WOULD ADVISE THAT SANTA SENDS ALL HIS ELVES
BACK TO UNIVERSITY TO LEARN ABOUT FAST FINANCE..
WITH DEGREES BEHIND THEM THEY CAN GO AND WORK AT ANY OF THE TOO BIG TO FAIL BANKS
THAT WILL BRING IN 200 THOUSAND EACH PER YEAR..
SECONDLY MRS CLAUSE COULD BE HIRED OUT FOR AFTER DINNER SPEAKING.. RAKING IN AROUND 100 THOUSAND A YEAR..
THEN WE HAVE THE REINDEER’S WHO IN-TURN COULD GIVE RIDES AROUND LAPLAND…
THIS WOULD BRING IN BIG MONEY. 50 GRAND A YEAR…
AND LAST BUT VERY NOT LEAST…
SANTA HAS TO SOMEHOW MAKE HIMSELF TOO BIG TO FAIL…
CONSIDERING WHO HE IS… THAT SHOULD NOT BE TOO HARD…
THEN HE COULD HOLD THE GOVERNMENT HOSTAGE
PAY ME 5 MILLION POUNDS OR I CRASH THE ECONOMY..
THERE IS NOT A POLITICIAN ALIVE THAT WOULD ALLOW THAT TO HAPPEN..
SO THE WAY I SEE IT..AFTER CALCULATIONS
SANTA WOULD DRAW IN AROUND 10 MILLION A YEAR..
ID SAY.. JOB DONE……
HAPPY XMAS…………
December 23rd, 2011 at 8:42 am
Several options really – my ‘first choice’ would be for Santa to set up an ICEa – i’ve heard its very cold in the North pole – so it shold be pretty easy to do…
He should also get gok wan to sort his outfit out – he can really get it looking designer off the high street!
He also should probably clean out his attic… imagine the old vintage toys! Make an absolute bomb on cash in the attic that!
And why not make some undies or perfume? all the other celebs are doing it… the festive range…
Essence of dasher…. hmmmm….. worth a shot?
December 23rd, 2011 at 10:25 am
Santa should set up a charity where from boxing day people can send their unwanted gifts. He can then take them all to his workshop so that the elves can work on each gift, modifying them so as they are up to date for next Christmas. He can pay the elves in mince pies which he saved from every house visit and the elves can play with any of the excess gifts. This way everybody is happy, and the gifts will most likely last longer due to the high quality of the elves’ workmanship! Resulting in a free Christmas for all:)
December 23rd, 2011 at 10:25 am
Santa needs help from his true love and their 12 Days of Christmas presents:
12 Drummers drumming (up new business!)
11 (oil) Pipelines piping
10 Lords-a-laundering (their expenses!)
9 Ladies (pole) dancing (lucrative employment!)
8 Maids-a-milking (every last pennies value)
7 Swans-a-winning (the lottery!)
6 Geese-a-laying (golden eggs)
5 Gold bullion bars (stuff the rings!)
4 Call-down loans
3 (million) French francs
2 Total Guvs (to keep the business in line)
and
a Mortgage at a Low Rate!
December 23rd, 2011 at 10:28 am
Get himself a facebook page and twitter account, befriend everyone and whenever someone posts a naughty comment put them on the naughty list and no pressie for them that year – he’ll be able to deliver all pressies within the hour and not break the bank doing it :p
December 23rd, 2011 at 11:10 am
I have thought of a couple solutions to Santa’s financial worries.
Firstly, he only works 1 day a year. He should really be thinking about getting a job for the rest of the year. I suggest dying his beard brown, and becoming a Brian Blessed look-a-like.
Secondly, Elves are expensive. They expect minium wage. Half of the time, they are sat around, not doing much. He should look at laying a few off.
Thirdly, he should look to be doing a few more TV apperances. I hear, if you go on Jeremy Kyle, you get £3000. He could claim that Mrs Claus is having an affair with the Boris Johnson and demand a lie detector test.
Fourthly, every year, Santa buys himself a new sack. He should really think about getting a ‘Sack for life’ Good for his finances, good for the environment.
Fifthtly, Reindeers are expensive to keep. They eat a ton of food at their vet bills are massive. He should really think about getting rid, and outsourcing his deliveries to The Royal Mail. If he sends the presents with the Royal Mail in June, they should just be delivered by Christmas.
Lastly, he should think about moving. The cost of living in Lapland is huge. Theres no Supermarkets for miles and they don’t even have a Nandos. He should think about moving to somewhere like Dudley.
December 23rd, 2011 at 2:10 pm
I think Santa could become a bit of a Entrepreneur. Lets do the maths.
He visits rounghly 1,500,000,000 homes a year. Lets say that 2 in 3 homes leaves him a mince pie. Instead of eating the mince pie he could sell them on. He would probably get 10p a pie from Tescos, Asda or Morrisons and probably 15p from M&S and Waitrose. But lets call it 10p a pie;
1,000,000,000 x 10p = £100,000,000!
Lets say he eats 12 pies though because after all, its a long journey. Thats £99,999,998.80p. Thats should see him through this rough time. And thats not even taking in to consideration the carrots that are left out. He could flog them to a snowman making factory.
December 23rd, 2011 at 2:12 pm
I think some downsizing may be in order, does he really need all those elves? How many wooden toys do children get these days anyway? A candy cane severence package for 20% of the workforce.
Rudolph also probably takes a lot of sick days with that red nose. We may have to look at letting him go…
And how much must his heating bills be up there in the North Pole? I think relocation of the workshop to sunnier climates might work
He’s probably been a bit lenient on the old naughty list too. We’ll have to rethink that one, I see lots of horrid little children on bikes on Christmas morning – bring back coal & an orange!! That’ll keep down the toy bill
Merry Christmas!!
December 23rd, 2011 at 3:23 pm
Simple, just end fractional reserve banking
December 23rd, 2011 at 3:25 pm
Mr Santa,
Times are getting tough and the way forward for your problem lies within one man’s ambition… It is time for you to recruit the GRINCH! The Grinch will be able to decrease the amount of Christmas cheer and ensure that children growing up will expect less and less each year by squshing their hopes and dreams for a cheery Christmas morning. We’re not saying “Let’s cancel Christmas” as that would damange your reputation. All I’m saying is that you need the Grinch to be on your side in this instance and embrace his darkness so help you retain funds. I exect the Grinch can take around 25% of the Christmas cheer next year and within 10 years time he can sucessfully steal Christmas which will not cost you a thing. We can only let him steal Christmas once as we cannot have this continue. If it was to carry on altogether, you would be out of a job! After Christmas has been stolen, we will increase the amount of Christmas chear by 3% each year and retain the Grinch on our side. That is the main aspect of cutting back and as you can see it is a long term process but you have forever to sort this out so it will work.
The second issue we need to talk about is staffing. The Elfs need to take ar eduction in salary of 50%. If they cannot take the deduction, please remind them that their other employemtn oppertunites at this time are nill as they are mythical creatures that no one has meant to know about.
The third point is that you need to get an electric sleigh. The reindeer are too slow and that is why you need (and have to pay) for so many of them.
We will also make other general cut backs such as the quality of toys, making the production line more efficient and reducing our electricity bill by switching off all the christmas tree lights it in the workshop.
I suspect we will be in the clear by 2035.
December 23rd, 2011 at 5:30 pm
He should enter lots and lots of competitions all year and then give away the free prizes!
December 23rd, 2011 at 6:16 pm
Well Santa looking at your Debt crisis I can see you heading to the United Nations for a bail out…. as Rodney would say it ‘Santa you Plonker’, but there is light at the end of the tunnel and these are my advise…
We could gather all the snow of Lapland and make them into Ice Lollies and sell them at the supermaket to make lots of money.
Tell all the elves they must take a pay cut in their earnings and reduction in their pension fund in these hard times and prepare to do more overtime and work harder to make sure the presents are all wrapped and ready on time.
Convert all Rein Deers to LPG to make them more fuel effcient and save more on fuel.
Lose some weight santa I know it must be hard going down those narrow chimneys with your big fat belly. Becuase half of your time is wasted on trying to go down the chimney. I suggest you give yourself a treadmill for christmas.
Loan the elves out during non christmas hours…. like at kindergardens or something.
Create your own charity where all parents can contribute and use that money to buy the presents. If you run out of money pay a visit to all the world bank leaders, tell them kindly it would be nice if the banks contributed for a good cause for once. If they dont tell them you have a secret video of them during their christmas parties… I am sure they will understand…
Pay a visit to all the finance ministers of the world and smile and say I think its time you cut 75% of my debt, tell them because of me the economy makes more money during christmas than any other time of year. If they dont threaten to sue them over misuse of your name and pic without proper licening and copyright rules.
Santa gather all the bills of presents and send them to the parents of the children to pay the bills of their childrens gifts, but only to parents who can afford to do so.
Last but least if the world comes together and helps santa clear his debts I am sure it achieveable because what he gives is a smile on our children which is ….PRICELESS…. which no money can buy.
December 23rd, 2011 at 6:51 pm
santa could do a sponsored mince pie eating contest to raise some funds to pay for the presents. Better still get the reindeer involved with a sponsored carrot eating contest. They’ll win hands (and antlers) down. The contest would be sponsored by First Choice of course.
December 23rd, 2011 at 8:22 pm
With Santa’s debts gone and no more a-crying
To First Choice he goes for holiday buying
Skiing or Sunshine where should he go
The choice is amazing and the cost is so low
Santa heads South, reindeers no stalling
First Choice is sunshine and cocktails a-calling
Beard is shaved and shorts are all pressed
Santa goes native and he stays as a guest
He’s on first name terms with all of the stars
And they all know his name in each of the bars
He’s known as the ‘Dude’, a bit of a player
But the truth, we all know, he’s more of a ‘sleigher’
No cheap old hotel for this diamond fellow
It’s Premier or nothing to make this guy mellow
With Rudolph and Prancer he’ll rock and he’ll roll
Cos he knows, come December, it’s back to the Pole
December 23rd, 2011 at 9:33 pm
I have a very cunning plan to save Santa and therefore save Christmas;
-Take out a wonga loan. I’m thinking about £500
-Go to the bookies In your normal day wear, not your red suit, and ask for the odds of Santa being real.
-You should get about 1000/1.
-Put the £500 on the bet.
-Rush home and put your red suit back on.
-Call a press conference.
-Tell the whole world that you are real.
-Rush back home and put your normal clothes back on.
-Go to the bookies and collect you £500,000.
December 23rd, 2011 at 9:54 pm
Santa got money worries he should start a colliation with the easter bunny start dishing out easter eggs instead of eggs with the bunny to help him that way they kill two birds with one stone and the easter bunny doesn’t has less worries as well and easter covered as well
December 23rd, 2011 at 9:55 pm
He’s going round the world, he may aswell make the most out of it. He could deliver parcels, for a very reasonable fee.
And/or
Hire himself out as a santa kiss-a-gram.
December 23rd, 2011 at 11:53 pm
Santa will first have to do an Income and Expenditure statement and if he doesn’t have enough money coming in to cover his outgoings he needs to enter a DMP before he goes into administration!
December 23rd, 2011 at 11:59 pm
Satas solution is to gather the cookies from the first pressie drop and use them as a gift for the next one! One present is all that’s needed, and everyone is happy – cookies are yum!
December 24th, 2011 at 12:06 am
Don’t blame “the stupid bank”, it is the state of the overall economy that is causing problems for people and businesses. Your folks are just going through a tough financial period just like millions of others but it should get better. Have a nice Xmas and be thankful for what your family has.
December 24th, 2011 at 1:49 am
Go into the delivery service! Being able to deliver to every boy and girl on Christmas eve means Santa has one competitive product on the market….SUPER FAST DELIVERY! He’d push every delivery service to the floor around the world; I mean, a personal and effective service everything next day delivery, even putting the presents in the house so they are safe! Gone will be the days of skiving and waiting on a delivery/delivery men putting parcels in “safe places” (I had one parcel put in the bin once by a delivery man, I mean, come on!!) Plus he’d earn loads of dosh from doing deliveries every day whilst the elves get the presents with the money he earns! SORTED. Man I should go into finance!
December 24th, 2011 at 1:58 am
Clearly Santa should be taking tips from the DVD set he is giving away — the answer lies in magic, and Santa should borrow Harry’s wand to magic his debts away! Simple.
December 24th, 2011 at 5:53 am
I’m sure Santa is now environmentally friendly – he will be using the ‘after effects’ of the reindeers poo to power his iPod Touch – the iPod Touch will be instantly updated telling Santa all the good n bad boys n girls in the UK ( or he could just watch ‘The only way is essex’ where everyone is bad…..in action and in acting!!)
December 24th, 2011 at 7:18 am
Buy Santa scratch cards available at all supermarkets and newsagents, top prizes from First Choice Holidays proceeds to Santa’s Childrens Toy Appeal – available from September 1st! buy now, Merry Christmas !
December 24th, 2011 at 9:51 am
Get the elfs to do some late night north pole dancing – heard it makes fabulous tips!
December 24th, 2011 at 10:08 am
kids need to learn that they can’t get everything that they want, even if it is coming from Santa. What happened to sharing a bigger expensive present with some stocking fillers and a tangerine.
If kids get everything at once, then what will be left for them for birthdays and furture Christmas presents?
December 24th, 2011 at 10:18 am
Santa should start charging for his services….
December 24th, 2011 at 11:06 am
I know that this is supposed to be a bit of fun
But actually its quite a painful one
They say the truth can really be hard
When some can’t even afford to send a card
The solutions my friends are not easy ones
But it all comes down to teaching kids the sums
Re-educate our children don’t you agree?
Teach them that presents are not for free
Tell them that even Santa has to pay
and has his limits even on a special day
Sit them down and watch a film or too
That show Christmas times some sad and true
Ask teachers to help them more with their maths
Get them to show figures and numbers on graphs
Wind back the clocks to the days of old
Where a stocking contained oranges, nothing bold
Join in with Nativity plays and carol singing too
Show them the value of family things to do
Let Santa’s gift be something small and healthy
Not only affordable by the wealthy
When your pennies allow and you can afford a treat
Then let children know it was no mean feat
Teach them to understand the work and sweat
To achieve nice things they won’t forget
But keep that Christmas magic alive and well
It’s all down to the lovely stories we tell
Let them believe in santa for as long as we can
But understand his magical not a money man
December 24th, 2011 at 1:33 pm
Santa should sweep chimneys as he goes. That’s a lot of swept chimneys and a lot of extra extra bucks for one nights work.
December 24th, 2011 at 3:10 pm
The solution is easy, he just hires himself and his team to the big movie studios during the non-Christmas period. The megabucks will come rolling in.
December 24th, 2011 at 4:59 pm
On the 1st day of Christmas Santa said to me, “How am I gonna get over this strife and worry?”
So I said to my mate Santa, like all things in life, when things get tough, turn to your wife.
Santa thought great, some wisdom from my mate, so off he went and spoke to an incredible lady, who was happy to help after she had finished listening to Slim Shady!
She advised dear ol’ Santa that he needed a plan, and sometimes he should ask for a hand. So she suggested he looked at the sponsorship model, and the companies went mad! But mad with happiness that Santa was totally rad!
The sponsors more than covered the financial outleigh, but the most important contract went to the sponsorship of the sleigh.
Can you guess who Santa chose to share the Christmas voice, well that is very easy really, it was clearly FIRST CHOICE!
Happy Christmas from Santa, his wife…oh, and his mate!
December 24th, 2011 at 6:33 pm
Santa should forget presents and help promote the real spirit of Christmas. In this hectic world, the best presents are free; friends, family and happiness
Oh, and give the elves a well earned break….with First Choice of course!
Merry Christmas all!!
December 24th, 2011 at 8:04 pm
To get this Santa outta debt
First he needs to get a pet
Or better still, place a bet
Maybe even offer a room to let
Try catching fish with a big net
And if he ends up getting wet……
grab a First Choice holiday YOUR ALL SET
December 24th, 2011 at 8:55 pm
Santa should hire himself out as a stripagram on his off nights x
December 24th, 2011 at 10:04 pm
I have a few suggestions.
1) Be honest with the kids. Say money is tight. That’s what my parents said as we were growing up and it in turn made our requests, if any, very cheap. And we grew up being more frugal and financially aware.
2) As an alternative, tell the kids the budget and then ask them how they would spend it.
3) If the parents have to spend, if you can pay the entire balance then always use a cashback credit card. It pays you for spending! Other than that, sign up with the larger and reputable survey sites early in the year and by xmas you could well have £500 of amazon vouchers stored up. Enough for a free xmas!
December 24th, 2011 at 10:56 pm
We’ve all heard “Hark The Herald Angels Sing”, well Santa should ask Angel-a-Merkel for a loan!
December 24th, 2011 at 11:07 pm
Santa should join forces with big bands like Take That and Coldplay during January – September, he could help with the staging on their sold out live tours – use his sleigh to fly in with the band members on and the elves can be backing singers/dancers, he would get 10% of the ticket sales and could use that towards presents.
When at the gigs he can give an inspiring speech to the thousands of people watching, educating them about the meaning and spirit of Christmas and encourage the spreading of goodwill rather than greed so people don’t want for presents beyond their means.
December 24th, 2011 at 11:08 pm
Santa’s financial woes would certainly be over if he got some quality easing from Merv the swerve King!
December 25th, 2011 at 3:08 am
Divorce Mrs. Claus and marry Kim Kardashian w/o prenup and then file for divorce and take her assets. lol
December 25th, 2011 at 4:25 am
Santa will have to start doing odd jobs here and there during non-holiday times to make up for losses including expedited shipping & delivery services, online letter writing courses, gift wrapping workshops, leadership & management seminars, and reindeer veterinary housecalls. Santa will also pen a memoir about his life as Santa, create a 99 cent smartphone game/app, provide guided tours of the North Pole, and start a blog with Google ads. Mrs. Claus will also offer cooking classes.
Santa will also begin quadruple checking his naught and nice lists to ensure only the deserving receive gifts.